There is a beautiful saying amongst the Irish peasantry to inspire hope under adverse circumstances:- "Remember," they say, "that the darkest hour of all. is the hour before day."
Well now the holidays sucked I gained and gained. When I finally got the courage to get back on the scale I was over 400 lbs. There goes my plan I had; I was doing well what happened. Who knows but I came to the realization that I was going the wrong way. What do I have a death wish? The vision I had of me laying on the bathroom floor came back to me in flight. That’s how they were going to find me.
Thursday (January 15) I got back on the scale. I need to do this I want to live and grow old and do things not just sit in my chair and watch the world go by. Sometimes it the darkest before the dawn, I hope so because I am in a dark place and need to see the light.
I was always told I needed a gratitude list:
1) I am alive!!!
2) I am sober
3) I have a family that cares
4) I have friends that care
5) I have Mandy
6) As Jim use to say “You have food, a place to sleep clean sheet, you never had it so good” I have all three.
7) I have a great job and good people around me
8) I have money in the bank for retirement
9) My mind still functions
10) Kojack the faithful cat is by my side
So its time. Lord know its time. All I have to do is ask God in the morn for a good day and thank him at night and put the next foot in front of me.
Let start it over again!!!